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Things to put into boring technical documents to test how far readers have persevered

This command will work, regardless of the colour of toothpaste used.

He did not hear the door open, but something, a sixth sense perhaps, or a change in the air, alerted him; something was wrong. He stopped and looked up. It was Bob.

The text of the next section is printed in an ink which is visible only to virgins.

On average, a car tyre loses about one layer of atoms per revolution.

The power output of a Class 91 locomotive is equivalent to approximately three Mars bars per second.

If there are three optical engineers, and a team is defined as a group of at least two people, how many different teams of optical engineers are possible?

There is a prize for reading this far. To claim the prize, ring this number: 07010 700642.

However, the current output need not be connected directly to the heat sink, it may be passed through a flange which in turn may be rigidly mounted onto a fishplate; if this is done, the fishplate must be tarred and feathered.

On power-up, the system will automatically psychoanalyse itself, checking for neuroses, phobias, and the simpler complexes.

The mains switch will be labelled "O" for on and "C" for off, indicating a closed and open circuit respectively. This will avoid long and inconclusive arguments on whether the usual labelling is "I" and "O" or "1" and "0".

The best cure for sea-sickness is to sit under a tree.

The remainder of this document is boring.

The temperature of the telephone is two hundred degrees.

"The perfect spot for a picnic," he said, spreading a cloth in the shade under the tree, and setting out his bread and cheese. But, waiting in the tree, the tiger thought so too.

This function will be activated by pressing a blue button, labelled "Do not press this button" in Greek.

No thermionic valves will be used in this design.

All single-bit flags will be printed on both sides, on plain linen 1 metre by 2 metres, and flown during daylight hours only.

Total Quatch-buttock.

The reader should be warned at this point that certain passages in the following sections have been shown to induce ennui. Unless the reader is known to have a high resistance to ennui, it is recommended that a supply of a weak stimulant (caffeine is normally suitable) should be kept readily available while the next two sections are being attempted.

Are 'Polo' mints triboluminescent?

This distinction is similar to that between formication and fornication.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dogs.

Suppose an average person consumes 3000 Calories per day, and that this all emerges eventually as heat. That's 12.6 Mjoules per day, or about 150W. The 55M people in the UK thus emit around 8GW. The 5.5G people in the world emit about 800GW. The 500 people in a typical public auditorium emit 75kW.

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexia Association!

Most markets will be satisfied with the standard filter wheel with red, green and blue segments. A French variant with red, white and blue segments is feasible, but a German variant with red, black and gold segments may be more difficult as we have not yet identified a black filter material with adequate transmission.

nib 1996-03-24..2009-04-21

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